Holiday Dating Survival Guide (Alphabet Theory Edition)
Ah, the holidays — that magical time of year when twinkling lights sparkle, peppermint everything appears uninvited, and suddenly everyone you’ve ever dated starts texting you like they’re filming a reboot of A Christmas Carol.
But before you fall into the annual trap of “holiday hopefulness” (a condition where you confuse seasonal loneliness with emotional clarity), let’s look at how to survive — and actually enjoy — the most relationship-charged season of the year.
ABT style, of course. 💜
🎄 1. Beware of the Seasonal Texting Surge
Every November, without fail, the ghosts of letters past rise like unwanted emotional holiday decorations.
If your phone lights up with:
“Hey, stranger”
“Happy Thanksgiving 😊”
Or my personal favorite:
“Thinking of you. Hope you’re well.”
...don't fall for it.
It’s not emotional growth.
It’s not fate.
It’s not divine timing.
It’s seasonal loneliness wearing a Santa hat.
Pause. Breathe.
Then respond with the maturity of someone who knows her letter groups:
“Wishing you well, too.”
…and close the door gently.
🎁 2. Know Your Letter Group in Holiday Mode
Each AlphaBet Theory group acts differently once Mariah Carey defrosts.
A–E: The Grounded Builders
They become extra responsible.
They host.
They organize.
They bring the good wine.
These are the people you actually want to be around this season.
F–L: The Steady Hearts
Everyone’s favorite comfort zone.
Warm, thoughtful, reliable — the ones who show up with a blanket and a plate.
If you’re dating someone in this group, congratulations. You’ve effortlessly survived cuffing season.
M–N: The Charming Whirlwinds
Holiday mode turns them into glitter with a pulse.
Fun, spontaneous, memorable — but not always emotionally consistent.
Great for parties.
Not always great for planning New Year’s Eve.
O–T: The Deep Divers
Sensitive, reflective, and sometimes moody.
They feel the holidays intensely.
If you’re dating one, be ready for meaning, depth, and at least one philosophical moment over mashed potatoes.
U–Z: The Wild Cards
Unpredictable in all seasons, but the holidays enhance it.
They might book a spontaneous trip to Aspen.
They might forget to RSVP to your work party.
They might do both in the same 24 hours.
Handle with curiosity AND caution.
(But you’ll laugh, I promise.)
🧣 3. Protect Your Energy at Family Gatherings
There’s always someone at Thanksgiving dinner who believes they’re on a mission from the Dating Census Bureau.
“So, when are you getting serious?”
“Are you seeing anyone?”
“What about that nice boy from church?”
Repeat after me:
“I’m focusing on alignment, not placeholders.” Then take a sip of cider or maybe something a little stronger, like the goddess you are.
We don’t rush into relationships just because Grandma thinks you’d look adorable in matching pajamas.
🦃 4. If You’ve Just Started Dating Someone… Keep It Light
The week of Thanksgiving is not the time to decide if he’s meeting your extended family, who still argue about who made the best sweet potato pie in 1997.
If it’s new:
No heavy labels
No dramatic expectations
No pressure
No assuming you’re suddenly “holiday official.”
Keep it simple:
“Hope you have a great holiday!”
No spreadsheets.
No emotional dissertations.
Just vibes.
🎉 5. Don't Confuse Holiday Chemistry with Compatibility
Holidays create:
Pretty lights
Nostalgia
Cold weather cuddles
Emotional vulnerability
Boredom
Bonus loneliness
Excess sugar intake
It’s basically the perfect recipe for misreading a moment.
Just because someone looks good under string lights does not mean they are your future.
Be observant.
Be grounded.
And please — don't assign emotional meaning to a man who just bought you a peppermint mocha.
🎬 6. Prep Your Exit Strategies (You Will Need Them)
Holiday boundaries are a gift to yourself.
Use these phrases freely:
“I’m keeping this season stress-free.”
“I’m focusing on family and personal peace.”
“I’m not emotionally available for holiday mysteries.”
“I’m choosing joy this year, not confusion.”
Add a smile and a gentle tone, and suddenly you become the emotionally intelligent queen of Christmas.
✨7. Create Your Own Holiday Tradition
This season isn’t about avoiding the wrong letters — it’s about choosing yourself.
Start something just for yourself.
A cozy ritual
A weekly self-date
A playlist
A movie night
A baking session
A gratitude practice
Peace is a holiday gift too.
And it comes pre-wrapped.
💜 Final Word: You Don’t Need a Holiday Plus-One
You need:
Clarity
Confidence
Boundaries
Joy
Laughter
Real connection
Friends who get your letter group
A good blanket
Snacks
If love shows up this season, great!
If it doesn’t?
You still have the whole holiday vibe.
Next Week: Blog Post 12
Do I Like Him… or Do I Just Like the Attention?
A little spicy. A little honest. Very necessary.