Dear Past Me: Stop Texting Him Back
Dear Past Me,
I love you. Truly. You did your best with the tools you had—intuition, butterflies, optimism, and that one friend who gave terrible advice but had great hair. And honestly? Those tools took us pretty far.
But we need to talk about the texting, especially texting him.
Because I recall how it happened.
He’d send “hey” at 11:47 PM.
No punctuation.
No context.
Not even a question mark.
And your whole heart would light up as if someone turned on a lamp.
Baby…
That wasn’t romance.
That was low battery mode.
You Weren’t Texting Him — You Were Texting the Renovation Plan
You weren’t responding to the man who was there.
You were replying to:
The potential version
The improved version
The fully emotionally available man who communicates clearly, schedules dates in advance, apologizes properly, and keeps his promises.
The version of him you created, like you were on HGTV: Emotional Edition.
You had blueprints.
A mood board.
Fixtures picked out.
The open-concept floor plan of his healed emotional landscape.
Meanwhile, the real man was still… in demolition.
Not ready for showing.
Permit not approved.
Hard hat required.
You can't move into a house that’s still under construction, sweetheart.
You Took Breadcrumbs and Baked a Whole Wedding Cake
He sent: "Miss you.”
And you translated that into: "I have spent time in deep reflection and realized you are my heart's home.”
Ma'am, he was just bored while waiting in line at Jersey Mike's.
Your Friends Weren’t Being Harsh — They Were Acting as Security Guards
Remember when your best friend said:
If he wanted to, he would.
And you got offended?
Sis, she wasn’t judging you.
She was trying to escort that clown out of your personal emotional data center.
She recognized the red flags before you turned them into decorative throw pillows.
You Weren’t Weak — You Were Hopeful
Hope isn't a flaw.
Hope is beautiful.
But hope needs to be supported by behavior.
By:
Effort
Follow-through
Consistency
And replies that do not come three business days later
We no longer accept love that comes in delayed installments.
And in Case You’re Wondering… You Grew
You have learned to:
Pause before responding.
Match effort, not imagination.
Choose peace over adrenaline
Recognize when “chemistry” was merely anxiety in disguise.
Your future self — me — is genuinely proud of you.
And she responds more slowly now.
Intentionally.
Because she waits to see echo, effort, and energy.
With love — and a raised eyebrow of shared experience,
Your Present-Day Self
P.S. He was not the lesson.
You were — and see how you’re learning to love yourself more.
💜
Next Week:
Holiday Dating Survival Guide (Alphabet Theory Edition)
Because nothing brings out the wrong letters like holiday nostalgia.